It seems like this is going to be the worst New Year's Eve ever. I will be home all evening lost in my pitiful thoughts. This is a state that I have been running from all year. It only creeps up on me when I visit my family, pretty much because I can't do what I want without a car. Mom is gone for the day, my sister has to work, but she will be with her boyfriend afterwards I'm sure of it. And my brother I am sure will be at some club. Where does that me? Alone in a house that kind of scares me because it makes noise and the fact that I am so paranoid about living on the first floor of a building.

I am invited to go to my cousin's house, but I have no way to get there. I could also go to my sister Sam house and be with her, but her mother is home from the hospital but I'm not sure I want to deal with her and the ultimate problem is I DON'T HAVE A CAR!! This sucks. So now I am trying to think of ways that I can enjoy being by myself. I can curl up with the Steven King novel that I am reading "Needful Things" it is very good, and it is the first of his books that I have read. I like his style!

Eating has been bad again, no gym because no car, do you see the theme? Note to self, staying with the family for an extended period of time SUCKS!

I love them though, just in case anyone doubted this...lol.