I'm so close to virgin weight that I can't stand it. Do you know what the scale said this morning? 180.4lbs. Nice! I will be able to finally say that I have reached another milestone, it has taken me forever, but I know that I will make it this time. The next one is to be under 180lbs. for at least 2-3 days. Last time I made it for a day so I didn't count it. I have to go and change my stats, but I don't have time right now. In the past month I have lost 7lbs., almost 9 if you want to count the week that I continued to gain weight. Of course most of this has happened within the last week after the month was over, but I'll take it.

Because I am doing so well I am afraid that I am going to mess up, or I'll get too excited and anticipate much higher loses than usual and then become upset with myself when I don't receive them. Well this week I am not expecting much because it will be that TOM. But girl can hope.

Sometimes I think that I am obsessed with weight loss even if I'm not actively trying to loose weight. I get on the scale multiple times a day even when they say you shouldn't, I begin to not eat things just to see how much more I can lose, or I'll even go to sleep so I won't eat. Bad I know. This was me this past week and even the weekend. I took too many naps to remember and got on the scale the same number of times. This is crazy! I know if I simply left my apartment it wouldn't be this bad because I know I wouldn't tell myself to go home to weigh in or to escape. Normally when I'm involved in something that's all I need and I forget about everything else.

This goes back to my friend count which is about zero. Let me rephrase that, I have friends, but we don't hang out often if that makes any sense. I go to the movies, shop, and go out to eat (ok, only once…lol) all by myself. It's just not enough. I'm the hang out type of girl go to someone's house and order or cook food, play cards, watch movies, all in very comfortable clothing :) I talk to people better in person because I am fully engaged and not trying to watch tv at the same time. That's why I can't wait to thanksgiving, because when I go home to visit they expect me to talk their ears off, because I always do. I tell them it because I don't have anyone to talk to when I get home every night…lol.

Only two more weeks to go people get ready for the food and shopping. I won't over indulge just enough till I'm satisfied (I hope). Sorry for the crazy post, I go from happy, scared, to depressed and back to happy all in the same post. I guess that's just me on an average day. Later people.